Wednesday, December 31, 2008

A little story and the Year of Resolutions

 
He was trying very hard. He was trying to sneak through the little space available. He had tried every angle possible. But despite all the push, he could only let half his body inside. He was looking around, for help, but the shock had left him speechless. The shock, that how could one be so mean to put a big stone on the front gate of his own house. The evening was merging with the night and the two will become inseparable soon . And it was chilly as well. His restlessness was increasing. I was passing around. I went past him at first without noticing him, immersed in my own troubles. But I realized, if I had missed something. I turned around and laughed. I found it funny. Well, he did not find it funny at all and gave me a hard stare. But he did not say anything. Anyway, I understood his problem. I looked and saw the big stone on his gate. I picked it up with my both hands and threw it away. He just looked and went inside. 

I shrugged it off and went on my way. Then, I just turned back. There he was once again, with three of his other siblings. They were all happy now, leaning into each other. The puppies never looked more cute.

My last article of the year...

Well, I do have lots of plans for the coming year. Though, I am not  known as a Planner (or Schemer: Quoting 'THE JOKER'), but there are a few things I would like to care of, before even the coming year fizzes out. But, even if I did not, the responsibility of being irresponsible lies solely with me, as always.

Welcome, the year of Resolutions!!

Monday, December 22, 2008

May be Lousy, but koshish to ki!!


Its been two days.
You have not shown your face.
Try, try some more.
Have we done some disgrace?

Come Out, Please Come out
I say,I pray
He feels,'This is not the time'
But you should be in your prime

Do not come for me,
for I can still live.
But think of those,
Who have nothing to give

They are shivering.
And you are aware.
Let them sink in your warmth.
The same warmth, which all of us will share!

Mornings are unclear and hazy
Afternoons are dazed, without your light
Evenings are confused on their own existence
Still, you dont seem to notice, our plight.

You cannot go to hiding. 
Nothing can hold you.
We are all waiting on the other side.
Nobody is a Captain here and nobody a crew.

'Yes, Yes!!', He says.I will come.
 I will pierce those clouds. I will pour my love.
 You have been waiting long. 'Till then'
 Hold the hands of those you care. Spread Warmth and be a Dove!!



Right Now!!

Right Now, I am looking for a woman, who is indolent and emotional and most importantly young because..

This is what my horoscope says for this week:

"An indolent and emotional young woman in a controlling position at work may over react and create difficulties for you"

Monday, December 15, 2008

An Unwelcome Development


In addition to make me emotionally confusing, increasing the patriotic feelings in me by somewhere around 200% , making my current job profile look as useless as ever  and an immediate thought to apply for a gun license instead of a driving license, the recent blasts have changed my life in one way which I am definitely not enjoying.
 Now, what is the relation between you and your work place? Your organization in particular? Are you loyal to it? Or loyal and dedicated enough to spend your leisure weekends thinking about that module which you left unfinished on Friday night. Do you love your work enough ‘not to say NO to your seniors’ when they ask you to come to office and work  on every single holiday. And sometimes, they don’t even ask, but its just a tacit agreement between the two of you, on which you don’t want to disagree. I will give you my answer. I am only loyal to myself. My relation with my work as of now is just- ‘I work and it pays me’. Ironically, when I started, I used to hear these words often repeated-‘We are not here for charity’. What a pity, they don’t apply this rule while extracting work from us. Oh, sorry for veering from the topic. Now, as I said, I just regard my job as ‘I work and it pays me well enough to make my ends meet’. Please don’t come out with your theories of ‘Work is worship’ and stuffs like that. I will not buy it. Yeah, I know the reason for my thinking this way. Lets not go into that.
So, what was the point of saying all this? Why should I  wear my company tag around my neck which has my I-Card hanging at the cross-section with a photo on which I look  terrible and my name printed beside it?I have this habit of always keeping my I-Card either stuffed in my pockets or deep inside my bag. I was getting along with it very nicely, until one not so fine afternoon, one of the security guards asked me – Where is your I-Card sir? I immediately took it out from my pocket and showed it to him. He said-Please display it sir? He actually asked me to wear it. I looked like a dog who has lost his memory and is made to wear a belt with his master’s name engraved, so that he realizes that he is still loyal to his master. This was the day after the blast.
I did it for two complete days. But, once again instincts took over. I could not care more about this. No body has asked me since to wear that. But bad days come when you are not ready for it. But, I am always ready. I want somebody to stop me and inquire me about my tag. I have my reply ready. ‘Though, I hate this place as much, I will not blow it up!!’

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Its That Time of the Year





Its that time of the year when..

--> Some Friends, who somehow dont get time to call at any time of the year start eating memory pills , so that they can remember to call you at a certain time today.

--> Number of Orkut scraps follows the inverse law of the value of stocks these days and may rise up to 10-15% over a period of just a couple of days and continue to rise with a slower rate of growth in the following week after which once again it goes slumbering and then stutters till the next period of awakening.

-->A lot of smileys in the orkut scraps from friends you never heard in the last year.

-->Mind unconsciously ponders over the period gone by and wasted and thinking where were you at this time last year.

--> You want to be happy, but you are not. You assure yourself that everything is fine and you are not out of place in your own world and wonder if I am at a stage where you wanted yourself to be. 

-->You go a couple of years back on the same day in college and still shudder remembering  the  Maggi and Cold drinks Bill which you paid.

-->You go more than just a couple of years back, when you were at home, and remember how your parents were happy and proud today, gave you little presents, and reminded you why this day is so important and which you realise now, that it is just another day.

-->You wait for that special call which usually comes at this time of the year and you tend to forget and forgive yourself and that special caller that nobody called each other before and feel good when that call does come.

--> The only thing which you want today is a nice little place, where you are away from all the mayhem and you can reflect back on what you have done, and what you should have done!!

In short, tomorrow will mark my two dozen years of stay on this lovely planet. Aah..when I was born, I had never thought, I will come this far!!!

Way to go!!!

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Blabbering: Two friends chat after another bloody 26th

Note: This is a real chat and not my imagination. A few of foul words have been used here by both of us but please do not assume that we are foul mouthed guys. This was written in the heat of the moment.  

ME---Myself
MF---My friend

MF: kya ho raha hain be ye .
ME: is desh ko inspector lobo ki zarurat hai
MF: heheh sach me.
ME: man...i may be joking...but this is seriously bad..
MF: yeah for sure.. its horrible
    can u imagine
    they ran off in police van itself !
ME: yes..saw the news
    cricket tour cancelled, champions league in doubt
    101 killed
    shit shit shit...
MF: u mean england going back or we r not going to our nex tour
ME: england goin back
MF: oh
ME: http://ibnlive.in.com/news/englands-cricket-tour-of-india-cancelled/79163-5.html
    shane warne says..he is nt coming to india
MF: oh damn
ME: its not worth the risk
    ponting wants champions league to be shifted somewhere else...
MF: that f****r will always want it to b shifted
    here ppl are still dying
    and these ppl are bothered about their cricket
ME: i had the same feeling
    i dont know...what can be done to stop this carnage every now and den..
    helplessness
MF: its v.difficult to stop this i guess
ME: was that a pakistani terrorist attack..
MF: dont know .. thats wot they r suspecting
ME: nuclear attack on pakistan..saala...destroy the whole f*****g country
    na rahega baans...na bajegi baansuri
MF: yeah and they 'l destroy ours ! they r mad !
    saale even we wont stay after that
    the remaining elements of that country will screw us
ME: i know..i was blabbering....
    i was not serious
MF: hehe ok
ME: violence is not always the solution
    but sometimes it is..
MF: but u know non violence is not working either
ME: u should know..when to use it and when not to use it..
    and how to use it for maximum effect
MF: hmm right
    i hope this is the final wake u call to our country 1!! 
ME: this damn country doesnt wake ...
    how many times they will try
    i am gonna be IPS.....
    and kick these guys in the butt
MF: hehe .. everyone thinks the same when an attack happens
    i want to be black cat commando ! 
ME: i know..i was not serious once again..
    i was blabbering
MF: ok ok ur blabbering a lot these days
ME: if I cannot stop violence..atleast I can spread peace..
     once again blabbering...never mind
MF: its ok
    i understand ur feelings
ME: everybody is feeling the same...
    aaj mujhe manager mujhe bole to m**r lunga uski...
MF: hehehehe
ME: bolunga....log mar rahe hai..aur tujhe proj ki padi hai
MF: hheheheh pagal ho gaya hain tu
ME: this was not blabbering.....
    this was serious..
    :)
MF: ohh ok
ME: dont mess with me today...
MF: ok ok
ME: hehe 
    abe kya rakha hai MBA mein...
    sab bakwaas hai
MF: haan main kal yahi bol raha tha
    soch IIM-A se MBA kiya
    aur phir taj me rehne ko mila aur taj me mara
    phir kya use of slogging all the way
ME: thats a really novel thought....
    thank god...I didnt give CAT seriously
MF: heheh seriously i thought the same thing yest . thank god i dint get overjosh to do well in             life.
     yaaar i feel now its time to leave this country cuz u alone cant do anything
ME: nope...that will be the last thing that will come to me
     i am not gonna desert this country
MF: nobody is deserting . i wont go for this reason but just feel that u shud not lose ur life to this     for no fault of urs
ME: dats true...
    but if fate means you to lose...give it a good fight anyhow
MF: u know ... sometimes i feel .. wot can i do as a citizen to make a difference
ME: atleast...you cannot leave...
MF: but wot do u do here by staying also ? when was the last time u voted during elections?
ME: i hv never voted...
MF: see if u dont even vote .. ?the slightest difference also u wont make
ME: bt its not like...i dont want to vote... I am staying away from home... 
    i cannot vote in bangalore..
MF: hmmm
ME: and I dont wanna use unfair means to be able to vote..
MF: hmmm
ME: atleast we can make a difference to our immediate surroundings....to spread peace, 
       love(s**) and maintain a healthy work and living
MF: hehehe ok ok
ME: so that no body else from outside with not so good intention can pollute...
MF: ok ok
    and study for snap cuz u will b put up in 3-4 star hotels after that atleast ur life wont b in               danger
ME: hehe....I am just gonna do my job...what will happen...happen
    you know..when I went to give IIFT..
    I met a guy before the exam,,,,
    who irritated me to hilt...with his problems and bad luck and his unable to give good                       performance in exams and his no job...and so and so...
MF: heheh 
ME: I wish...I could have been more sympathetic to him and given him encouragement.. :(
MF: arrre koi nahi be . now exam ke time tu bhi kya kar sakta hain
ME: but the point was...not about having problems...but how to deal with them..
    this guy was looking defeated
MF: hmmm... see sometimes u just give up hope u cant blame him ,when all roads look blocked u cant pose like an ideal man !
ME: i am not blaming anybody...but I dont see a point in being depressed...
MF: well.. we r not in his siutation to understd exactly the feeling
ME: I am having problems as well..and they are serious too..
    well..may be u are right..
MF: the problems and resistance level of each person is diff
ME: but even If I imagine myself in his shoes...i dont think..that I had be so sad so as not to smile
    agreed..peace....
    everybody is different
MF: yah i mean before the exam there is no point in thinknig that ur a loser !
    thats the last thing i wud want to do !
    btw i dont think we ever think we r losers
ME: exactly....this is the point....
    courage and confidence will be the last things on my 'to lose list'
MF: yeah true i agree
ME: karna dharna kuch hai nahi..bas courage aur confidence ka jhanda lekar hum chillate rehte hain
    we are biggest hypocrites..
MF: hehehehe...
   abe ab tu details me mat jaa
ME: details..kya sach hi bol raha hun
MF: hmmmyeah
ME: abhi tak maine kuch kiya to hai nahi..ki bolun ki maine courage dikhaya ho
    tune shayad kiya ho :)
MF: hehehe.. nothin which i recollect that bold..
    well.. wot the police who lost their lives did yesterday that is courage
ME: yes...
    even, once I hit continuous three sixes in an over when required 25 runs to win in the last over...
    that was courageous
    we lost by 1 run though..
MF: hehehe.. like that i bowled 4 overs and gave 2 runs and picked 3 wickets against my seniors and turned the match .. though it became a tie. heheeh so     thats courage at low level
    but actually thats not courage
    thats bakc***i waala courage
ME: i know..i was blabering once again
MF: real courage will b tested someday and we will know that day
ME: yeah..

Saturday, November 22, 2008

One fine night

I was in [No] mood to write today. I was sitting whole day at home. Doing nothing, but wasting time in a usual nonchalant manner.[Now, would you believe it? Read the first sentence. I wrote, 'I was in a mood to write today'. But in mind, I was writing,'I was in no mood to write today'. I missed 'No'. May be I was destined to write today.]. Lets move forward. Talking about doing nothing, and waiting for something to happen, which I could rant, reminds me of  an incident, when I was still in school. I had a friend, who stastically speaking was a couple of years junior to me. For the record, his name was (we are not in contact now) Gunjan(a boy). Mentioning 'a boy is necessary becauseI know someone who shares this name and is not a boy. Moving forward, he comes to me one fine afternoon and says, 'bhaiya, aaj paper mein maine padha tha, ki aaj mujhe kuch meetha khane ko milega. Maine shaam tak wait kiya. Kuch meetha nahi mila to maine bazaar jaa kar mithai kha liya'.Ok, move it forward, man!!

So, it happened, that nothing happened when whole day I was something to happen. It became dark soon. I just took a jacket(yes, winter is here) and stepped outside. I regretted it soon after and came unscathed in a little over 20 mins. I guess, I was destined to be hit by some speeding truck or atleast a drunk rick kid on car today. It had to be my innocent looking face beneath which I hide all my anhumanly thoughts and tendencies, that God decided otherwise, and I was only hit  twice with lightweight harmless articles. 

First hit. I was crossing the road and when I reached the middle of it, avoiding and bucking evrything, I was hit by an aeroplane. A paper aeroplane. Right in the forehead, just above my right eye. The plane dropped on the road, shamelessly.  'Ok, well, that was nothing', I thought and moved ahead. 

I was going inside a general store to buy myself a chocolate. As I was moving in, I got hit by a chocolate wrapper. It missed my eye by a hair. As it happened, a guy was coming out with a chocolate, and he was in a hurry to taste it. The chocolate went inside his mouth and its wrapper hit me. Ofcourse, I was soon being tested with bouncers. 'Oh, I am sorry, I was aiming it somewhere else. That was not intentional. I am really sorry.' 'Its Ok, no problem, it happens!' I said and moved past him inside the store. This was my second hit.

I took the chocolate and while I was paying,  the boy who was working there told the owner of the shop,' jo sahab pehle chocolate le rahe the na, unhone yahin par chocolate khol diya aur uska kagaz aisa pheka ki  ee sahab ko ekdum aankh mein jaa kar laga'. I said that, that was nothing. 
The owner said,'main aapko bata deta hun ki , ye hindustaniyon ke paas kabhi dimag nahi aayega!'. 

Startled by his remark at first, I just said,'Aapke pas hai na?'.


P.S-Just wanted to share this. Have you watched Dasvidaniya? I doubt, if you have heard the name. Its a small, low profile movie. My take-go for it. It will please you more than most mindless entertainers that are coming off late. 


Thursday, November 13, 2008

God's Morning Joke

All of a sudden, I have become very conscious of my waistline. No, it has not increased upto alarming levels, not yet. But, time moves very fast. And if we dont keep track of it, it will move us out of track. I am proud of my waistline, in the sense, that, I can still boast , that it is more or less the same as it was during college days. Sitting in front of 'white screen with black boundaries with letters dancing in it' for long hours has not affected my waistline too much. And when my peers and friends say that ,'abe, tu to waisa hi hai', I take it as a compliment. But for how long? I realised that I am hovering over a thin line that separates, what you can call a 'hatta katta swasth banda' and a 'mota banda'. I am in a age group where, we often neglect the thin line in our pursuit of growth, money, power, career(almost synonyms of each other) that we invariably trip on the wrong side. So, I decided to take the plunge before it gets too late. So, what  am I going to do? Or rather how am I going to do?

Among other things, with steely determination, I have started to go for a morning walk. So what, if I am going in jeans. Lack of suitable clothes  can not stop me from starting. Determination has been pushing me from bed  for last three  early mornings. But, I will be tested in coming days. Winter is crawling slowly. Air is already cool and scented with the its fragrance. I hope to keep my ground.

Talking of morning walks, I remember an incident. 
Nightouts were an integral part of my college life.(They still are. Though the frequency has decreased). I had a weird habit of going for a walk in the mornings on most of those nightouts. I believe, it gave me a sense of achievement, a feeling of doing something good, after wasting time in nights. So, it was one of those days, when I was sitting on my bed parallely to  the backdoor which I had left open to welcome the dawn. (It was ground floor). I reckon, it was around 5:00 AM and it was still dark outside, when I opened outside wooden door.(Left the inside webbed door closed ) I had pulled my running shoes from under the bed and started reading something, as I waited for 'some light' to come outside. After about 15 mins, I turned to see towards the door. And, I saw a person(I am inclining to say man, but I didnt see the face). In plain white clothes, he was trying to see, who is sitting inside the webbed doors. I rushed to the door. But he was gone. I opened the door violently and rushed outside. But he was GONE!! Absolutely, no human presence anywhere near was visible. Honestly speaking, I was more curious than scared. 

Was it God's joke to pull me out of my room and announce that the dawn has indeed come? If yes, then he succedded. As I went for a morning walk soon after.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Longing For...

I last met her almost 3 years ago. It was January of 2006, when I saw her going away. Its been a long time, yet her memory is as fresh as my disastrous semester results during that period. And part of blame definitely lies with her. I know, that she definitely did not meant to hamper my already garbage like semester performance, but whenever she was around, my half energy was spent in taking my mind off her and I would  struggle to put myself up for the paper at hand. I cant forget those mornings when she used to look at me, smiling, and I used to smile back curled in my bed. There were some nights, when she gave me troubles, but at those times, she was most charming. It was 3 years ago, when I last met her.

And then she went away. She promised to come back. She promised that she will see me soon. But, I failed her. I went away. I was not sure of myself. I did not promise anything. I longed to see her. She was in my memories. She did come back. To see me again, to torment me again, to give me bliss and pain at the same time. But I was not there. I knew, she had come back. But I did not go. It was her greatness, that she was not disappointed. She said, 'I know, you will come back one day. Take your time. I will still be waiting'.

And I came back. 3 years was a long wait. I have sensed that she is coming once again. I cant wait to see her again. She has already  started teasing me*. 

Here, I am. O Winter, Glorious winter!! Come soon and inhale me.

* Suffering from (20% cold+30% Cough+50% severe headache)

P.S--> Desparately waiting for Saturday to come. Going home after nearly 1 year. Will be away for some time. So, my handful of dear readers, Dont miss me :)

Thursday, October 23, 2008

How True!!


Below lines are the opening songs of a animation movie 'The Lion King'

From the day we arrive 
on the planet
and,blinking,step into the sun


There is more to see
that can ever be seen

more to do 
than can ever  be done

there is far too much
to take in here

more to  found 
than can ever  be found

But the sun rolling high
through the sapphire sky

keeps great and small
in endless rounds

Its the circle of life
and it moves us all
through despair and hope
through faith and love
till we find our place
on the path unwinding
in the circle
in the cirle of life

Just makes us realize, how significant or insignificant, we and our problems are  in the bigger picture.

And yes, ever found a lion cub so cute? No? Watch 'The Lion King'. You will feel like adopting one. Shhh, we discuss this in whispers. Else, those animal welfare organisations come out with daggers.  

Oh Simba, you cutie!!

Sunday, October 19, 2008

I Smiled, She Smiled



After spending couple of hours in the dignified coolness, which the confines of CCD was happily providing me, I finally decided to move out. I walked out into the beltering heat  of the Sun, in to the Sunday mildly crowded roads.  I still had time to reach, where I intended to. So, scorching heat notwithstanding, I decided to walk.

I saw her. She was coming from the opposite direction, but on the same side as I was. She was not alone. She was with a guy who was walking beside her. Distance between them was enough not to attract attention. Oh, yes, I did not pay much attention to him. Oh, sorry, I did not pay any attention to him, except for the fact that he was with her. It was hard to take your eyes away from her face, once you have seen it in all her prettiness. I kept on moving. And then I noticed a little girl, with a pleading face, that can melt an iron rod with its coldness. The little girl was half walking, half running behind the boy, urging him to buy a rose from her. The boy shoo-ed her away blatantly, with a whip of his hand. I dont know, what he thought more absurd. Buying a rose from a little girl in the middle of the road with Sun watching brightly, or giving the rose to the pretty girl he was walking with.


The little girl found her dying hope getting a fresh air, when she saw the girl looking with pristine gentleness. She wanted the rose. It was written on her face. But, something was stopping her. She kept denying the little girl politely. I went past her. I went past the little girl. I didnt notice the boy, though. The little girl gave up. She had trusted the girl, whom she was calling 'didi'. Both kept on walking. In opposite directions. But the girl's eyes were still on the little girl. She kept on looking as she moved away. I stopped. I was looking at her. The little girl came near me. She did not say anything. She did not have to. I had bought the rose. I raised the rose, in a manner saying, 'in your name' towards the pretty face. I gave the rose to the little girl. I said,'This rose is for you'. She was still looking. This time at me. I smiled. She smiled too. She was still smiling, when atlast that devil boy intervened. She went. We knew that we both were smiling.  The Sun smiled  with a wink behind a cloud. And the little girl smiled too.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

This is Half Fiction


I

One of my friends was really worried. He said,'yaar,  jane kis liye aaye hain is dharti par, kuch pata hi nahin chal raha'. 

I said,' abe, tu aa gaya. yehi kya kam hai!!'

II

One of my collegues,' Hey, Kunal. My dad is asking me to come home for Diwali. Will I get leave or not? Hey, tell me na yaar'.

I wanted to say,' Abe dhakkan, am I your manager? Go and ask your manager whether you will get a leave or not'.

But being a nice guy, this is what I actually said.

'Abe sun, agar teri manager tujhe chutti nahi degi, to tu ghar nahi jayega? Projects to aate rahenge, jaate rahenge. Job to tujhe dusri bhi mil jayegi, par Baap to tera ek hi hai!!'

Last heard he has booked his tickets without informing his manager.

III

Few days back, I went to meet one of my friends at Delhi Railway Station. I rarely spoke three words continously in an almost 90 mins talk.

Here are the most often words used..

Hmm
Ok
Achha!!
Shit yaar!!
Tension mat lo
oh ho!!
Phir?
Uske baad?

Needless to say, the person was from Venus. I guess, the ratio of words spoken by her and me was somewhere around 5000:1. Hmmph, I really fall short of words while talking to girls.

IV

I usually take a walk while returning from office with a friend of mine. Here are a few illustrations of how he usually starts his conversations.

'Tujhe pata hai, Pune mein maine do ladkiyan patayi thi......................................................................

'Yaar, ek baar to ek ladki mere ghar par meri maa ke paas baat karne ke liye chali gayi thi..........

'Main ek baar ek ladki ko seriously liya tha, par usne mujhe seriosuly nahi liya. Uske baad main kisi ladki ko seriosuly nahi leta.............................................

'ek ladki se main baat kar raha tha, mujhe uspe gussa aa gaya. Maine daant diya usko. Ab uske phone aa rahe hai aur main utha nahi raha. Ab raat mein time pass kaise hoga yaar......................

Huhh, no wonder,I am still single.

Enough of these light stuffs for now. I do have some serious stuffs to write. Well, may be some other time.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Almost Famous!

'Hey, you', the teacher suddenly said in the middle of explaining some topic. The whole class of almost 80 students  was under absolute silence for a few seconds. I looked up to see who it was the teacher called. 

'Shit!', I muttered with gritted teeth, seeing the finger pointed at me. I got up.  Teacher demanded,'What are you writing for so long? Bring the copy to me. I want to see it.' I was very nervous(not afraid though). I presented a thick file to the teacher. He was very furious. I was completing my workshop file in a Chemistry Class. 

'What is your roll number?' 

'2K2321'

'Hmm(checking the attendance register)...Mr Kunal Kishore Malviya, get out my class'

I knew it was futile to make excuses. I accepted my mistake and took the punishment.

This incident, my friends, was the highlight of my 1st semseter engineering class.  This incident made me a household name, for everybody who was present in that class. Though, I am not particularly happy at the incident taking place, but in hindsight, I can just laugh at it and be happy at the positive results, it yielded.

A few days later.

In the same class, the teacher was telling each one its attendance count.  I knew, mine was well enough to clear  the cut off required, I was a bit surprised, when it came out to be that I was leading the class by a margin of one. I just calculated that he had still given me attendance for 'that' day. Reading my face, he just said,' You can not get punished twice for the same offence, isnt it?'

I just admired him. 

I learnt from the incident, though, that I will have to be little more careful with my instincts and which are the classes which are most suitable to complete workshop files.



Friday, October 3, 2008

Payback Time


          Everybody knows whats going inside the head of Mohan Bhargav. Expression(or the lack of it) says it all.

Scene 1: A poor, ill-fated but honest 'julaha' turned farmer sitting in a dimly lit room across a rich US returned Indian and telling him his story of 'still existing discrimination on the basis of caste' and his  incapacity to pay land debt.

Our rich NRI listening to him with 'mute outside-shocked inside' expressions.

Scene 2: While sitting beside a window seat still immersed in his thoughts of the other day, a small boy of about ten comes and begs you to buy a glass of water for 5 paise. He takes the water and gives a  Rs 5 coin in return. While the boy is counting his money to give you in return, the train starts and finally runs away.

The two scenes are from movie Swades,  a rare Sharukh flick which I admire. I have watched this movie countless times and each time I have undergone  the same current of emotions with the intensity only going stronger and stronger.

These two soul stirring scenes, in my view, will be one of the greatest scenes ever to grace the big screens. These two scenes reveal the dark and ugly face of INDIA which we almost always tend to neglect behind those big glass buildings. May be a rich poor lad living in posh Mumbai have not witnessed situations like above. But, I have. You stop at a signal for 2 mins, and you see a couple of half clad children displaying a few antics of their own and then looking  at you with expressions which just cannot be put into words. Or worse, a lady will come with a baby(needless to say that both will be in utter bad shape) and will beg you for your kind attention. I am sure that situations like these and above can have more jaw-dropping reactions than one while seeing Bipasha in bikini. The bikini will remain with you momentarily, but the faces of those children, will cut through your heart, as it has cut mine, not once, but again and again and again. I tend to agree that seeing these situations so often have made our senses numb and indifferent much the same way, as regularly happening Bomb blasts doesnt evoke enough reaction now a days. 

Every time I see something like these, I say to myself, ' Dont forget those faces ever. You have to come back some day. You have to give it back some time.  You have to risk it all at one point'. 

I once read in a Hindi chapter- 'Akela chana bhaad nahi phod sakta'. I say, 'akela chana try to kar sakta hai'. 

The payback time has to come.

Remembering Gandhi's words:

Hesitating to act because the whole vision might not be achieved, or because others do not yet share it, is an attitude that only hinders progress.


Monday, September 29, 2008

Are you there and Others


Are you there? Are you there?
Are you there? Are you there?
Are you there? Are you there?

This is the voice, which has been irritating me a lot for a few days. This is the ringtone kept by one of my collegues in his extension phone and he is away from his seat 83.4% of his time in office. Geeeeeeeeeeee!!
Arre bhaad mein jaa!! Yes, I am here, but I wont lift the call.(Pun intended)

Of Other news - 

One of my collegue was happily saying everything in affirmative whatever he was asked. Though I got the meaning, but I was not exactly getting what word he was using. So, I said - "hey, hold on. What are you saying? Is it 's', 'Yes' or 'Ass'?" Thats a different matter that he almost threatened to kill me after the last word.

I just read that a fatwa has been issued against Pakistan Prime Minister (some Ziradari or Zardari!!) aftet he complemented some American minister - 'You are gorgeues'. Offcourse, she was a lady yaar. Just wondering, if they had given him a place in Pakistan Kabaddi team, if he had said - 'Mohtarma, maaf kijiyega, par aap mein wo baat nahi'!! Speaking in urdu may have been a good idea though. Huhh....When will people grow up?

Now moving to some entertainment news.

Sanjay Dutt was pretty upset with Imran Khan when Imran did the stunt of jumping from 12th floor by itself for his soon to be released film 'Aguwah'. Oops, Kidnap. Sanjay promptly called the Oscar khan and expressed his concern. Here is the excerpt of their conversation:

Sanju calling Aamir - 
He hears the caller tune - Maa, Meri Maa...
Sanju puts the phone away from his ears as he becomes too sentimental after hearing this song. Aamir finally lifts.

Sanju  :   Hello
Aamir :   Hello, Haan mamu, kya haal hai?
Sanju  :   Arre main to nakli mamu hun, tu asli mamu apne bhatije ko samjha, nahin to tapak                          jayega ek din. Saala 12 manjil se kudne ka stunt khud karta hai.
Aamir : Jawani ke din hain. Karne do. Jab umar ho jayegi to sikh jayega. Aap bhi to sikh gaye.
Sanju  : Meri leta hai, kasam se Kidnap karwa lunga.
Aamir : Chill Mamu, abhi mujhe Oscar jitne ka tension hai, ye sab chote mote cheez ke liye meri                  secretary ko phone kiya kar.

To aapne dekha ki, ki how a Imran ke  josh mein kiye hue ek nadan harkat has put a darar in the friendship of two Mamus.

And now the most important news. And I hate myself for this. I have lost, no not my mobile, but my Debit Card, yet once again. I dont know, where I dropped it during my almost 10 km journey which I took yesteday. I only came to know about this in the night , when I had only 20 Rs in my pocket and I went to ATM to withdraw some money for my dinner.  I didnt panic though.(Ab to aadat si ho gayi hai yaar!!) Luckily, no damage done.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Bakwaas!!!


A truck driver to another truck driver - "Dum hai to bhaga le, warna peeche laga le"


Amitabh Bachhan - "A shooter wins a gold medal at olympics and you give him Rs 1 Crore. A shooter is shot dead fighting terrorists and you give him Rs 5 lakh? Who is the real winner here?"

And lastly the best one - 

  "Satyanash. Kab se us haar pe nazar laga kar baithi thi. Aur manzhi ne use ek naukrani ko de diya"
 
No need to guess, where the last one was spoken.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

The Co-efficient of Achievement



"Much comes  to you now, and in nice, harminous ways. You dont have to struggle to achieve. Your efforts produce effects far beyond your expectations"

Choose the options which are correct on the basis of the above statement:

1. You struggled a lot. You achieved a lot.
2. You did not struggle. You did not achieve anything.
3. You struggled a bit. You achieved a lot. 
4. You struggled a lot. You did not achieve anything.
5. You did not struggle. You achieved a lot.
6. You did not struggle a bit. You achieved a lot.
7. You did not struggle a lot. You did not achieve anything.
8. You put some efforts. The effects were far beyond your expectatations.
9. You did not put any effort. There were no efforts.
10. You put a lot of effort. The effects were not far beyond your expectatations.

aahh......bor ho gaya options de dekar. I think these will be enough. So guys, what do you think. All those serious CATers, have a crack at this.

By the way, let me tell you, that those lines were the first few lines of my this week horoscope(21st sept-28thsept). Kya bakwaas hai yaar - 'I dont have to struggle to achieve'. I guess, I wont achieve anything, because I wont struggle....HEHE


Saturday, September 20, 2008

Lazy Tea Drinker


Saw some dream, a nightmare in fact. Dont remember the exact contents, but I was definitely not feeling great when I woke up in the middle of night. Frantically looked for my cell to see the time. 5:12 AM..err..not bad I thought. It has been drizzling relentllessly here, it is a kind of weather which makes coming out of bed doubly difficult. But, being a hardworking guy(yeah...I know you will have a lot of comments on this), weather cannot keep me  pinned  to my bed. So, I come out of my bed to do what I had to do. I knew I had to do this, and as I strive for  perfection, I wanted to do it myself. I go straight to kitchen, praying that some milk is present. Ahh...I found it. Thanks a ton to my generous roomies, I can have a hot steaming cup of tea straight out of my own hands, which is all I want now. 

This has been the most noticeable change in me in the last month. Though, gulping 6-7 cups of tea in a single sitting was never a  tough task for me in college days, but those days were  far between. And I was never an addict.  Though, we all aspire for good, kadak cup of tea when the weather is almost inviting you with its pleasantness, I was the one who will not feel particularly invited. I was happy being cuddled in bed under a light blanket, with Fan on. But, this has all changed now. Now, I make my own tea in the evening and compulsarily need one in the morning to have my senses start working. And..gosh...I didnt even know how to make one hardly 15 days back. I asked my roomie to give me crash course on - 'How to make a great tea?' He was more than happy to give me the lesson, as I was 'drinking' with his effort for last one month. As, I did nothing but just sit in front of my lappy with a quirk smile on my face whenever I am at home, the hot steaming tea which he brings every now and then just about completes my picture of a lazy busy day.  And he feels happy now, because I can also bring tea for him sometimes.(Though, I pretend to be either sleeping or having a pain in my back whenever he is back from office, less he asks me - Abey, chai banayega kya?).  But, whenever I do prepare tea for him, he smiles and says - Wah, kya chai banaya hai yaar. Ofcourse, that makes me happy too!!

OK...Just finished my tea. Got to do now what I had to do. SLEEP!!!

Sunday, September 14, 2008

And Now Delhi!!


This is a chaotic scene at Barakhambha Road in Delhi. This is the same road from where  I boarded the buses for Noida for last 2 weeks. And I didnt go this week to meet my friend. Call it fate or something else. If I had gone, who knows, I may not have been writing this. 

 I did get a few calls after the blast enquiring about my well being, which made be believe that there are a few who would have been affected if any misfortune had happened.  Though, we always feel shattered, emptiness, hollowness, anger, sympathy, pain when ever anything of this sort happens, this feeling evaporates in thin air as soon as we get a deadline to complete the coding of a module by your boss in office. But this blast me realize:

-the danger is closer than it appears
-misfortune may be just on the other side of the road

Just think,  that one of the pictures of people in the photo might have  been mine, just another innocent victim of crime. 

This piece is not meant to scare anybody. You ask me - am I scared? I say blatantly 'Yes'. Yes, I fear and I am scared. But more about the society and the atmosphere I live in than myself.  I am scared more about the impending doom that is looming large, unless, unless......................

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Anger Non - Management

I was damn angry today. Literally out of my mind. Not sure if I should even write this blog. Or should I even call it a blog? May be for everyone but not for me. If I had been in my senses, may be it would have found a secluded place in my brain and rested thereafter. But, since it makes no difference either way, why not write it and see if it has any takers? And even if it doesnt, I am angry anyway. So, this is not my regular piece of -' a lame try to create humor ' kind of blog. And for the first time, I least care about how bad my literature is or whether the use of that verb was apt or not. The point is to get my message across.

As you all know, and just in case, if some of you are not aware because you were too busy coding 500 lines of java a day, let me inform you that BIHAR is drowning. Its not the first time and the future does not look so great either. And no second guesses now that BIHAR is my home state. Yes, the same wretched, dirty, uncultured, polluted, corrupted place, where everybody who has atleast heard the name will be happy to starve in Antartica than to go there and reside. Yes, the same place which gave India its first President. The president who in his school days got a remark - "The examinee is better than examiner". The same place which gave world Jainism and Buddhism. The same place which at one time boasted of the first university in world. I can go on and on, but what matters is the present and its future. No kind of development happening in the state seems to change the mindset of people who are completely unaware of -'erstwhile glory days of Bihar' and has grown up hearing only about Laloo Prasad yadav and Rabri Devi. Their no discussion with a Bihari completes without asking 'did he did what he did' and whether it is a safe place or whether every second Bihari is a thug ready to pounce upon you and relieve you of your valuables without thinking twice. Guys, Guys, Guys....are you nuts? Well, I am not here to clear any myths about Bihar and neither I am so hopeful that IBM will open a R&D lab in Patna after somehow stumbling on this blog. And I definitely dont have a Harry Potter's wand which can put all the misery to end in time less than what it takes to pronounce Bihar. I know it will require a herculean effort to get things on track.I am just here to give my anger a vent and some day may be Bihar will catch up on all the states. Just remember that if Bihar progresses, India progresses too...

Now, why was I angry? It so happened today that we got a mail in office today to donate voluntarily for Prime Minister Relief fund to aid the deteriorating flood situation in Bihar. While, I am not going to reveal how much I contributed, but here is what I heard from few of my collegues during lunch. One of them remarked, how was it useless to contribute money and they were dead sure that money is not going to reach people. One of them remarked (in fact advising me) that if you want to send Rs 10 to Bihar, donate Rs 100 here. Man, I was amazed how did he reach to this precise calculation. I said," Dude, I am from Bihar". And then, he said something about not being aware that I am from Bihar and so and so!! I was feeling like,"To hell with all of you".

Whoever is reading this blog - Just answer my question honestly. Will your feelings, attitude or behaviour towards me change before and after coming to know that I am from Bihar?
Will you make a slight stiff noise with your nose and a contorted face if you ask me which place I belong and I say Bihar?

If yes, maintain a safe distance from me. No, I am not going to kill you or harm you, but I dont want myself to be in yours company.

I know this post will be a kind of shock for many of my friends as they are not used to seeing me in this avataar. Just want them to know that this kind of silly and baseless comments can bring out the beast in me sometimes. And I am not here to convince every living soul that Bihar is a paradise. Certainly it is not. But its atleast better than most of all those contorted faces. I will rather let my work do the talking. Yes, I am angry. But I have enough sense and strength to bounce back.

Watched Rock On!! - Feeling relaxed and pumped at the same time!!

Monday, September 1, 2008

Papa:Dont Read this!!


Its Friday evening. Came home quite late by my standards (around 7 PM). My collegeues are so supportive that when, one day at 5:15 PM, I was still in office, one of them remarked, " aaj to tera overtime ho gaya yaar!!". I just politely replied,"Yes, you are true, sir. I was about to leave".

Now, coming to the day under discussion, (couple of days back), when I entered, I found an unusual calm at home. I soon found out that, all the guys are in one room. Their animated faces say that they are in a state of 'forced concentration'. Confused, what a forced concentration is? Imagine watching saas bahu serials with someone, when you want to watch beach volleyball, but cant do anything, less you offend someone. Here, the man of the moment is someone who looks like a financial analyst. All formally dressed with shining black shoe. You know, the sort of guys who helps you with your investment plans, or rather tries to help you. And when you meet him, after listening to all the plans which he has in his kitty, you gently say, " I will call you back in couple of days after considering all the aspects." And both the parties know that the call will never be done. On the present occasion, however, the other guys are pretty serious or rather look very serious. And with every passing moment, the guy is confident of striking atleast a couple of deals.

And here I enter. I say, "aur bhai logon, kya ho raha hai." They continue their discussion without paying much attention. Feeling something important going on, I also sit and try to concentrate to listen to his words. After some 15-20 mins, he is all done. Then, he looks at us and you suddenly remember that you have to ask a couple of questions to make him feel better and assure him that you actually listened. Now, I am quite good at it. So, I shoot a couple of questions and he seems impressed and sees in me his next client. My expressions can be quite deceptive as he soon realised. He started asking me ques...the ones like, where do you work, how long have you been working, what is your present salary and how much you get in hand approx and how much are you able to save every month. Lots of questions..huhh. My friends are quite amused. They are assured that, now atleast I will oblige the guy and he wont have to go empty handed. Then came the big Q:

"So, sir, how much money do you have in your account now?" asked the guy.

I said," Rs 393.60".

All hell broke loose. My friends started laughing.

The guy, not able to frame the correct kind of response, just muttered, "Surely, you are joking Mr Kunal".

I said, " I am not".

The guy had to go empty handed. I could clearly listen the echo in his mind - "When will these software engineers learn to save".

Two years of job and Rs 393 in my account? Sounds strange, weird, inconcievable? But unfortunately true. I do not have any answer to 'HOW'.

My friends said - "Paise transfer karun kya!!!". I just smiled and said, "No need to worry, salary day is just 2 days away. I can manage".

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Dude..Dont you have any manners?



Hey..guys.. remember her?

She was the cause of our momentarily (well more than a moment actually..)increase in our interest in TV.

She was the reason why four wandering souls use to spend a Saturday evening in room and pulling each others leg.

And her scathing dialogs - Dude, " dont you have any manners" were a part of our lingo for quite some time.

And when she was gone, so did our interest in MTV Roadies 5.o.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

The Indian Punch


I returned from office around 5:30 in the evening(a bit late than usual) and instantly asked my roomie - "Bhai, match kitne baje se hai". He said,"shayad 6 baje se".

On any other day, this conversation would be understood of being one about Cricket. But, it was not. It was about Boxing match (Beijing Olympics Quarterfinal)

Of all the games in the world, boxing is the last game an average Indian mind takes interest. I may be wrong in the above statement,but this is what I have experienced so far. We discuss the repeated failures of Sachin, analyse the inconceivable consistency of Hussey, the triumph of Dhoni, the rise of Shaun Marsh, the inspirational leadership of Warne, or more recently the weirdness of Mendis's bowling. If not cricket, then we curse the pathetic state of Hockey and non-existence of Indian Football. Even the no-achievements of Sania Mirza get more coverage and viewership than other games. Where does Boxing come? I have never witnessed a boxing match being discussed with earnest interest. We have never waited eagerly for a boxing match to commence as we have waited for an indian chase in 2nd innings to start. But atlast or atleast, I witnessed a change....even if it was for a meagre 10 mins or so...I will cherish it for a long long time.

The quarterfinal match started. The suspense created by the various news channels was an icing on cake..though a bit irritating. Despite feeling sleepy, I was all set to cheer Vijendra. The excitement was evident everywhere. As it happened, every solid punch, every solid defense and every point won was cheered with full throttle. In between rounds we discussed his clever defense, his subtle movements and his quick attacks. With every round won, we could smell the victory and when finally his counterpart from Ecuador bit the dust, our joy was boundless. Though assured of a medal, we all felt, the job is only half done. Now, go all the way and win the Gold for us. It was indeed very heartening to see a sport other than cricket being given a overwhelming support. After all, it was a matter of National Pride..isnt it?

Looking back, I just think that it was just the unexpectedness of a Gold Medal win from Abhinav Bindra in shooting that caught everybody off-guard. Otherwise, it would have found a similar audience. Now, we are just left to search his winning shot video in youtube and play it over and over and feel proud of ourselves.

P.S - This post means no disrespect for any game. I am just happy that every game is getting an audience which can feel the agony of a disappointing loss and rejoice in a stupendous win and nothing will go unnoticed.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

My current non-happening Project



which has given me so much time to take the snap and wait for 15 mins to get it uploaded!!

View from my Flat...Falling Flat



Surrounded by Walls...Big Walls
Embrace it...or dare to see beyond that...Above that....

Monday, August 11, 2008

From a Banglorean to a Delhite!!

Long Long time ago..the devils workshop was on full swing. Giving products which was being applauded by one and all and it looked like a period when RGV was once producing movies like Satya and Rangeela and everyone thought he cannot put a foot wrong. But Alas!! So, unlike RGV, I took a break, though not a planned one.

What I did these last few months?
Lots of things. Finished a few novels(Gone with the Wind, Seabiscuit), watched a few movies, the most noticeable among them being The Dark Knight, Batman Begins, JFK, The Last King of Scotland, Once, The Princess Bride,(have not watched any recent hindi flick) and amid all these took time to do a complete overhaul of my life, my environment, my routine. Shifted my base from Bangalore to Noida. Change of Project, change of team, change of weather.

While leaving bangalore my room mates said, "tu jaa raha hai, jaa, par ab teri ye 'hep' life khatam ho jayegi. Boring life ho jayegi teri. No more baddy now, no more aish". With all my doubts and apprehensions intact inside, I went ahead. Was I sad while leaving? To an extent..yes. But I didnt try to make things complex by thinking too much about what I will lose by going ahead. I am quite good in concealing my actual thoughts behind the curtain and projecting in front what I want to project. And they think that I am a ........

I left behind the company of my good friends, that sense of belonging whenever I came from office. I dont have anyone now to argue about who will win the next IPL and or whether Federer will beat Rafa in the next French Open or whether Chidi looks more like Anil Kapoor or Sohail Tanveer(debatable). Really wanted to see Kerala once again and visit Kanyakumari, but ..Suri - dont worry..wo din bhi aayega. I dont have anybody now to make plans whether to go to Bangkok or Andaman in holidays.(The truth is we four roomies have not even went together for a movie ever, someone or the other always drops out). But who is stopping us in making plans together. Now, even that is gone. The trail of last two years in bangalore is too strong and memories too sweet to let it go so easily. Life has indeed become boring. Earlier there was no time to think or do anything. Now, I am bored of thinking and forget about doing anything...I was always a lazy bum.

Whatever was said before has indeed become true, but I think I am smart enough to come out of this predicament soon. From a banglorean to a Delhite, the journey has been abrupt but not without some pain. I am not going to compare the two cities, as each city has its own share of flaws and each city has its own charm. Nor, will I ever debate my decision, simply because I had nothing on my mind while doing it. I just did it.

Someone's loss is someone's gain. I have my fare share of friends here and I hope to make the best of them. And ofcourse, to make some new friends as well. Now I have the time to do all the non-sense I ever thought of doing(thanks to my non-happening project). Touchwood. And also to catch on my much needed sleep which I lost somewhere in the last few hectic months of my last project.

So, why to be so serious?
The art of travel is to deviate from the current plan.